Well this year has gone by so fast. Its hard to even begin to know where to start--so I won't. Pieces of the year will fall into place as I intend to blog again. If you are opposed to relationship talk, including sex and intimacy, I suggest you not read this month. No nothing kinky, there won't be details, just some basic information on an experiment we are doing for each other for our 9 year anniversary. We are going to have sex every day this month as a gift to each other, and trust me for us this is a great gift. Not because we don't already frequently have intimacy in our marriage but because it is soooo good.
Despite the fact that its amazing, life gets in the way sometimes. We go to bed at different times, dealing with schedules, the kiddo, work, etc. Sometimes we forget that without each other the rest of this would just be so pointless. This year I have been embracing vibrancy and health. One of the aspects of that is our relationship. We've always had a healthy relationship. We made communicating a critical part of our marriage during the first few years and as a habit that has stuck around I'd say its one of the best ones we have.
When he was deployed communication was all we had, and we took really good care of each other so that we always felt loved, and were never tempted to stray. Its a lot of work. But when its habitual it just feels so natural, it doesn't feel like work anymore.
I don't know if this will just feel like fun exciting adventure every night. I"m curious to see if it is. As far as habits go, more frequent sex in our marriage is one I am totally on board for. I've worked hard this past year to go to bed when he does. Even if I'm not tired. (I never am, I still have to take sleeping pills) BUT if I go up when he does we have time together. Even if he's reading and I'm watching a show on my ipad, we are there with each other. Our feet touch, we stop and talk to each other, have sex more often than when I wasn't going to bed at the same time. And, I take my sleeping pill earlier which means I fall asleep earlier. A nice thing has happened. I actually get tired at night.
its almost 10:30, and this is late for me now! and I love it. I slept in this morning until 8:30. Sleeping in used to mean 11, 12 or even 1pm because I wasn't getting regular solid sleep. I do now. A few months ago building strong sleep habits became one of the important things for me to do in my health journey.
I am focusing on what I DO want in my life, with my health, in my marriage, not on what I don't want. I'm not worrying about the negatives, like the fact that I'm still overweight. Instead I'm focusing on what I want. In April I wanted to do a half marathon. So I did. It took me 4 hours, but I finished. That was 40 pounds ago--this month, I have two 5K's. As a family we are doing the color run, where the proceeds are going to the Huntsman Institute that helped my mom with her cancer.
and then another one with NAMI. National Awareness of Mental Illness.
For our anniversary we want to do something amazing fun. So we are going zip lining. It closes before the anniversary so we are going on monday. Its the steepest zipline in the world. I'm thinking when I lose my weight I'd like to...anymore. I am thinking I'd like to...and then I do it, and as I am doing this I am losing the weight and all the self doubt and negativity along the way, its just being replaced.
Do I still have insecurities? you bet. Do I focus on them, sometimes yeah, but I am getting better and better at looking at my reality instead of my fears, and living my dreams instead of not dreaming at all.
Most of the health work I have done this year has been mental, and now I'm ready for my body to catch up to where I am, I think having the mental there first is going to be the difference between yo yoing back and keeping the weight off because I live a completely different life.
I wanted to teach cooking lessons. I do.
I am back at work, its part time which is all I want, but something where I get to run things, and go be a professional instead of just mom. And then I LOVE being home and being just mom. because just mom is a pretty amazing thing to be.
I go out for girls night.
we have date night once a week.
we play games and hang out as a family.
My life is about what I want. And this month, I want to really connect with my husband on an even deeper level and celebrate the 9 years we have had together. I'm not waiting for 10 to celebrate. 9 is a good year to celebrate. Don't worry--for 10 we are going to Hawaii :)
Well I'm headed to bed. Its past my bedtime (pretty cool I actually have one of those now)
and for day 1, well...my crazy hair is a pretty good indicator that we are off to a really good start.
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